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Most converts to Islam pass through a number of phases in our se…

Posted on January 9, 2016 by Shahid Bolsen

Most converts to Islam pass through a number of phases in our search for the Truth. This search brought us, by Allah’s Mercy, to Islam; but we continue developing within Islam, trying to gain knowledge and move towards the authentic interpretation of the religion.

We pass through an initial period of trying to reconcile our previous beliefs and culture with Islam, and some, perhaps, remain in this phase. They are the ones who say things like “the American Constitution is fundamentally an Islamic document” and other such things.

And some pass through a phase of Sufism. This is common in the West, particularly because most bookstores fill their “Islamic books” section with books of poetry by Rumi and the writings of Al-Ghazali.

Many of us pass into a jihadi phase, and even a khawarij-type phase and takfiri zealotry.

I have, myself, passed through all of these phases, and in each phase, I was active. I organized Muslim voters at one point, and dealt with aspiring Muslim political lobbies in the US, when my knowledge both of Islam, and of the political system was still very limited.

Alhamdulillah, I dispensed with Sufi nonsense very quickly, and moved into the jihadist mindset very early.

In university, I was studying law, intending to become a lawyer, but abandoned this course because I did not want to work in a kufr-based legal system.

I was a naturally gifted artist all my life, but gave it up as soon as I believed it was haraam.

In the mid-1990s, I seriously regarded Mullah Omar as Emir-ul-Mu’mineen, and pursued ways of joining the Taliban.

I believed, at one time, that killing and jihad are the same thing. I refused to wear Western clothes, and would not even look at the face of a man who didn’t have a beard. I made takfir on sinful Muslims and believed in the violent overthrow of every regime in the Muslim world., and the establishment of Khilafah by force. I was, yes, at one point, quite an extremist. In fact, I can say that however extreme or rigid you may think you are, I was more extreme and rigid than you.

By nature, I am absolutist, literal-minded, and I have a quick and violent temper (Irish), and even now, my first reflex is usually, like many brothers, to advocate violence, but I have learned to subordinate this reflex to rational analysis.

What I am saying is, If you are believe in Ikhwani ideas; I have been you. If you believe in Da’esh ideas; I have been you. If you believe in Al-Qaeda ideas; I have been you. In all these cases, I have read what you have read, heard the lectures you have heard, and know all the arguments.

The positions I take now are informed by this background and tempered by experience and the acquisition of more information

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