There is something we have to talk about. It is embarrassing and awkward, but Wallahi, we have to address it because it is tremendously dangerous.
Of the top ten countries in the world that view online pornography, half of them are Muslim countries.
I am not concerned with talking about any of the possible reasons for this that may come to mind; the strict segregation of men and women, the impermissibility of dating, the difficulties and prohibitive expense of marriage, etc. I am concerned with the impact.
A young man contacted me a while ago, confessing that he suffers from addiction to viewing pornography, and asking for advice. This is something we really have to deal with, and it affects far more Muslims than we care to admit.
When I was very young, I found a magazine my older brother had hidden. It contained naked pictures of people performing sexual acts. I looked at it, felt dirty and ashamed, but yes, I almost immediately wanted to look at it again. Later in the afternoon, I remember being with my mother, and I could barely stand to look her in the face. I was absolutely plagued by guilt and shame.
Back when I was growing up, this kind of material was extremely difficult to obtain. Magazines were sold in certain shops in certain neighborhoods, and anyone who went to them was terrified that they would be seen by someone they know. Now, of course, that is no longer the case. It is easily accessible, and it is indeed, accessed more prevalently now than ever before, and this is affecting society. It is affecting popular culture, it is affecting the content of mainstream media (which has to compete for viewers), and it is affecting marriages, families, and individuals in their internal psychological health.
The religious position is clear. It is zina of the eyes. It is impure for your heart. It is completely forbidden. But, alas, it is not the remedy is not that simple. Muslims know all of this, but they are still doing it. A shaykh will tell you to fast, to lower your gaze from what is impermissible for you to see, or he will tell you to get married. I don’t think any of the Muslims viewing pornography are unaware of these recommendations.
I think you have to understand what this habit is doing to you, what it is doing to your heart and mind, what it is doing to your dignity and to your relationship with Allah. Understand that Shaytaan is trying to weaken you, trying to erode you; that he hates you, has contempt for you, and has contempt for the beauty of the relationship between men and women, and he wants to take that from you. He wants to prove that you are an unworthy creation. He wants to prove that you do not deserve the honor Allah gave you; and he wants to debase and degrade you and every beautiful thing Allah has given you.
With this, and indeed, with any other sin; I think it is important for you to recognize this. It is important for you to recognize that you deserve to not do it. You deserve to be better than that. Intimacy between a man and woman deserves to be cherished and this kind of material is a malicious degradation of that, it is Shaytaan mocking human intimacy; it is an insult.
You have to know that your heart deserves to be pure, you will defend that purity when you value it, and you can understand how valuable it is when you realize how aggressively Shaytaan is trying to ruin it.